June 25, 2004
sketchy

ConstThxCOFFS.jpg

A magnificent drawing of Keanu as John Constantine by Coffs of Keanu Reality, a russian fansite.

Check out more great inspired art here.
-via KeanuWeb

By the way, speaking of Constantine, does anyone have a Variety subscription?

Cinema Expo 2004, Europe's main exhibition trade show, closed Thursday with extended footage from "Catwoman," Oliver Stone's "Alexander" and Keanu Reeves starrer "Constantine" captivating delegates....

I'd like to know if there's anything else about Constantine in the article. Just not $29.95 worth of like-to-know.

And of course I'd really like to hear from someone that saw the footage.

Hmmmm, the Expo was in Amsterdam. Where the hell is Julie!?

constantine , tribe | from inside the mind of krix at June 25, 2004 12:02 PM .
Comments

There isn't anything else in the article. I read the whole thing when searching Keanu news on Yahoo. I guess they have a back door to Variety, sometimes anyway.

Posted by: Chianti on June 25, 2004 01:31 PM

Thanks Chianti :)

Posted by: krix on June 25, 2004 01:41 PM

uhh... i saw the footage...love the footage... how are ya krixy...? well, i'm wearin my ivy-leafy-purplerose-lilac top with my jeans and a cute jacket...just running out to grab a bite at kennedys and then to rent some highly recommended videos/dvd's...all relating to or having keanu appearing in them of course! (niece and nephew are coming over later)

article in variety probably reads(that reminds me - make note to self... to get subscriptions to hollywood reporter and variety...) and i'm not quoting them on this!!!!

Constantine excellent classic cinematic fare... premiere date most anxiously awaited...ticket buying public will NOT i repeat NOT be disappointed...keanu shows a whole new light...
Constantine Rocks!!!!!! wait a minute...movie goers will be flocking to see constantine!!!!

Posted by: wanda on June 25, 2004 01:41 PM

Just to clarify, you're talking about his feet or something, right?

Also, I'm doing fabulous. I gotseveral packages of clothes I've ordered recently, one is a slinky black top with ruffle leopard cuffs. I only hope I can play bass in it.

Posted by: krix on June 25, 2004 01:44 PM

You love them cuffs don't you...;)

I was thinking of your white top with the fluffy cuffs [when you said 'Hi' to Ke] only the other day.

And yes, I wasn't going to pay no $29.95 either...

Hey Wanda!

Posted by: Keanuette on June 25, 2004 02:45 PM

Hey@Wanda

Oh heck (except stronger), I'm in suit! SOMEBODY SAVE ME!!


...neo?


Posted by: shelz on June 25, 2004 04:17 PM

KRIX-quote: "Where the hell is Julie!?"
*cough* I was at the Ivy. I mean, that's the place to be these days, you know? ;-)

*giggle* No, I was just EXTREMELY busy, nearly missed deadlines and stuff. I did lurk everywhere, but I was just too exhausted to comment, LOL! And... I was also involved in a rather embarrassing tap-dancing incident after I tried to express my joy upon receiving a maple-syrup parcel from Zen, but keep that between us, OK? It kind of went like this: Oh! A parcel from Zenny! I am so happy! *tappity-tappity-tap-tap* *CRASH* *cough*
However, I DID manage to scramble together some tid-bits from various Dutch magazines regarding the movie expo! :-D
--------------------------------------
The Amsterdam Gazette, 25 june, 2004 By Julie! Wobblefeet.

It was a night of glamour, a night of magic, a night of...
Foul, depraved, blood-sucking demons from hell, ready to destroy everything in their scorching wake...
Screams of terror were heard, as dismembered bodies were thrown about the place, in a mad frenzy of gruesome violence, as the Dutch hooligans cried in victory upon reaching the quarter-finale of the European soccer-tournament.
Reaping and ravishing souls wherever they went, they turned the whole of Amsterdam into an orange coloured blob of madness. *tsk*

Meanwhile, on the *other* side of Amsterdam, the Cinema Expo 2004 was being held.
A bunch of bearded, (the women, too), intellectual people sat down, and felt very important.
And they should feel that way, because they were treated to a delicate pre-view of the "Constantine" movie, starring the beloved actor Keanu Reeves, and someone named "Shia-La Frouf-Frouf" as his dapper side-kick. Not making ANY mistakes in the public relations-department, the producers of the film had kindly provided the entire audience with buckets of holy water, to soak their feet in during the movie, in order to make the experience "more realistic".
Because, as anyone with any knowledge of the movie knows, this is clearly and obviously the best way to transport oneself to hell. For security reasons (Threaths had come in from a malicious, yet cute group called "The Hellblazer-board" at the last minute) the clip shown during the expo was very brief, in fact, it only lasted 2 minutes. The logo of the movie flashed upon the screen, and that was about it. Audiences RAVED at the glory of the letters, the technical quality of the font, and the cunning use of colours. The tiny scene in which Keanu lighted up a cigarette in a sensual, brooding way afterwards, received high praise as well, and was nominated *best actor in a lighting up a cigarette scene* by the expo-jury, while critics predicted that just this shot alone would ensure eternal bliss for the many Keanu-fans around the world.

Meanwhile, the star himself was hiding behind a potted plant during the entire viewing. Known for his elusiveness, Keanu had opted to go "unrecognised" that evening. However, he was forced to give up his hiding place when a cute long-haired woman accidently bumped into him while she was performing a rather strange tap-dance.
Needless to say, camera's flashed. And perhaps, so did the woman ;-)

Reeves was outraged at this invasion of his privacy, and proceeded to attack the paparazzi, claiming that he had given them PLENTY of photo-ops lately.
And as he grumbled and pulled out his huge "Holy shotgun", many loud cheers were heard, mostly coming from the enthusiastic female bystanders.
Unfortunately, Mr. Reeves was arrested for lewd conduct shortly after this.

The movie will open in 2210, and will hopefully raise enough money to bail him out ;-)

Posted by: Julie! on June 25, 2004 06:59 PM

bwahahahahaaaaaaaaa

THUD.(rolling around floor lol)

you actually had me going for about the first paragraph or so..hah.

Posted by: kaz on June 25, 2004 07:15 PM

Holy shotgun indeed.

*thud*

yeah babay.

Julie! you are beyond \m/RAWKin\m/, whatever that may be...

Posted by: Nudel on June 25, 2004 08:46 PM

ROFLMAO @Julie! I'm laughing so hard I can't see straight!

I'm sure that's only part of the story Julie! Those newspapers tend to miss a lot of very important information and details. Like one of the things I would be asking is "Why is Shia his side-kick, and why make a movie like this with such obviously controversial content (I mean just look at the reaction from the Hellblazer fans!) I'm sure many fans object to this lack of information...I know I wish it were out there to be read. I think if people had a better understanding of the content of this movie, it might not be so controversial to them. But, alas, they're just going to have to wait until it comes out.

...and Keanu, I've got a "get out of jail free" card, I'm playin' for you by proxy!" LOL!


Posted by: shelz on June 25, 2004 08:57 PM

right...right...!!!!! what i meant to say was i haven't even seen the footage and i love the footage...silnky black top with ruffle cuffs...
a hem... leopard cuffs!!!!!!! you CAN play bass in that top!!!! you have to!!!!!....)))) my niece and nephew and his friend anthony were over today and we painted shirts... nicky made me a becky t-shirt... very cute... two stars at shoulders, and "i heart becky" in red, black, gold and sparkle shimmer" very cute!!!!!

and also... did just watch waking life...still absorbing it all...v e r y interesting stuff..)))
loved especially the animation...

Posted by: wanda on June 25, 2004 09:57 PM

julie writes and excellent spoofy article...!!!

Posted by: wanda on June 26, 2004 12:36 AM

Yay, Julie! for Chief Critic of all KMovies to come!!! Dank u seer!
She's back! Girl, I missed you! *hugs*

...and I do hope K will have to stay in a prison in Holland...
...so we can take turns in baking cakes and smuggling in files...
...and take turns in having conjugal visits...

Posted by: Niobe on June 26, 2004 01:57 AM

i hope that my idea is good for you!

Posted by: christelle on June 26, 2004 02:50 AM

ROTFLMAO, Julie!

Congratulations to the Netherlands for reaching the quarterfinals of Euro 2004.

I so wanted to be one of those officials who'd seen the Constantine trailers. I need a career move. ;)

Posted by: jeanna on June 26, 2004 03:16 AM

@julie
'ROFLMAO' , you‘re unbelievable!

Posted by: creezy on June 26, 2004 03:21 AM

I forgot to thank Coffs & krix for sharing. :)

Posted by: jeanna on June 26, 2004 04:18 AM

Julie! That was friking hilarious girl. I love it when you do that. You had me going for a minute there...lol

Posted by: Kat on June 26, 2004 08:33 AM

My nose! my NOSE! It hurts SO BAD when Red Bull comes spewing out of it.

Julie!=The Funniest Girl in the World

Posted by: krix on June 26, 2004 09:25 AM

Julie! I hope that daedlines are definitely "dead" and youŽll continue to tapdance together with us. *hugs*

Posted by: vika on June 26, 2004 02:31 PM

LOL@Krix!...Julie! does have a way about her ;-)

...Vika as far as I'm concerned, I'm gonna "finish off" those "DEAD-lines!" (no pun intended)LOL!

Posted by: shelz on June 26, 2004 04:17 PM

Ooh ooh, can I be funniest GUY, then? :D

Posted by: Mikey2 on June 26, 2004 10:58 PM

LMAO! I *heart* Julie!.

Posted by: Zen on June 27, 2004 04:38 AM

Aw, thanx everyone! I *heart* and miss you all, too! Unfortunately, my job doesn't listen to these considerations, *drat*

Mike, Krix already gave you the title: 'Cutest fact-checker on the net', so don't get greedy ;-D
And I'm sorry I hurt your nose Krix! Bwahahhaha, this is the same thing you do to *me* all the time :-D

Oi, and I totally forgot to mention that Coff's drawing is just beautiful :-)

Posted by: Julie! on June 27, 2004 07:40 AM

...hope your nose has recovered Krix LOL!

Posted by: shelz on June 27, 2004 06:31 PM
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