Along with the usual playing dress-up [note to self: must shop. cat ears from Walgreens does not a costume make!] and general trick-or-treatery, I think I'm going to watch The Watcher sometime this weekend. Yeah, it's bad, but Keanu's performance is deliciously creepy. So menacing, yet sooooo sexy, eeeeee!

And thanks to the magic of The Wayback Machine at Archive.org, I was able to unearth the much-missed Keanuland.com's Watcher Drinking Game!

Take one drink:

• You spot any geographical blooper.
  
• You spot any blooper.
  
• Whenever there is a murder.
  
• During any shaky grainy footage.

Take two drinks:

• You see Marissa Tomei.
  
• Joel Campbell pops his pills.

Chug down your drink:

• David Allen Griffin performs the devil bunny dance.

We love the devil bunny dance.

Happy Halloween and have a great weekend, everyone!

On Thursday, November 4th in Beverly Hills CoachArt.org hosts ART FOR THE HEART - a Silent and Live Auction featuring celebrity co-hosts Lake Bell, Jason Ritter and Marsha Thomason.

Celebrities including Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Anne Moss and Sean Astin will design a total of 50 unique, heart-shaped plates to be fired and finished by Color Me Mine. They will be displayed gallery-style at Christie's. Each item will be auctioned with a donated personal memorabilia piece. The evening will also include cocktails, food, music and celebrity hosts.

CoachArt is a Los Angeles-based non-profit organization that provides free lessons in the arts and athletics for underpriviliged children with life-threatening illnesses. Click here for more details.

To purchase tickets and to get an idea of what the plates will be like you can go to StubHub.com's page on the auction. Several items are available for online bidding, unfortunately Keanu's is not one of them at the moment.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Nothing could give you more power over your fears than a Halloween devoted to impersonating your fears. That's why I suggest you get yourself a costume that will let you pretend to be what you're most afraid of. If a nuclear explosion is your greatest bugaboo, dress up as a mushroom cloud. If your boss is the source of your most primal dread, become him or her for a couple of days. If you're terrified of being exposed as a fraud or descending into poverty or losing your good looks, dive into the heart of that scary experience.

Hee! You can get anything in a swedish Slovakian supermarket it seems. Thanks to Vika for sending in this advert.

That look? Melts me.

So, I think I've fried the nice Ampeg combo bass amp that Dave lets me use. It peaks out WAY too often and I'm certainly not that ferocious of a player. I don't know what the problem is, but I do know that it's a big source of stress for me to have my sound cut in and out in the middle of a song. Thankfully this hasn't happened live yet, but I fear it will as the problem gets worse with every practice.

It's about time I get my own rig anyway.

You know where this is going, right?

I want the Reeves package (shut up, I'm talking about his amp).

Musician's Friend just extended me enough credit to get a GK 800RB and a SWR Workingman 4x10T.

Should I do it? I know it's a little nutty, but I would be actually using it, not making it part of some weird Keanu-shrine in my basement or anything. And the bottom line is, I kind of trust his judgement on something like this. He could afford any setup he wanted and this is what he went with. I would choose a wine based on his expertise in a second, so why not defer to his many years experience as a bassist?

I'm definitely buying a new amp. We have a gig on the 5th. Tell me I'm not a kook for thinking about buying this one.

SomethingAwful.com asks: "What happens when you strip away a movie's title and replace it with a literal description of what its movie poster looks like?"

The answers are found in their Photoshop Phriday results.

Part 1
Part 2

Some of these are hilarious. Many are...um, mature themed, so consider this a 'not safe for work' warning. There's some quality skill there as well, matching lettering and styles perfectly. After browsing through all of them, I realized there was no Keanu content so I did my own.

Snerk.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

A couple of things are getting annoying when it comes to the blogging.

One is that I'm coming up on nearly two-thousand freaking entries and frankly, the clever-title well runs a little dry some days. So rather than wrack my brain, you'll be getting random lyrics from time to time. I'll try and make them tangentially relevant somehow, but no promises. Especially before I've had my morning redbull. Of course, there's always bonus secret cool points for knowing the song.

The other thing, of course, is that it's such a slow time for news. Google and Yahoo alerts have so much noise to signal I can't stand it. The ferret thing was cute, but for the most part, it's a stretch. Every weekday, I faithfully check the script sales website to see if he's got a new project announced. Or maybe an update on an old one.

I think this feeling is what the word "bupkiss" was invented for.

There certainly are some interesting films being pitched out there, though.
I'm interested to hear about the Edie Sedgwick film (wasn't Molly Ringwald going to do her bio? did that ever happen?). The Untitled Miniature Golf flick? Not so much.

Good grief. "A-Team", "Dallas" AND "Miami Vice" movies. They really are running out of ideas in Hollywood.

There are a few ideas up there that I could certainly picture Keanu in, just for fun. I'd like to see him in another comedy, although "Hip Hop Nanny" is probably not a good match. I guess I'll keep holding out for "Bill and Ted III".

I hope Keanu is enjoying this break. He certainly deserves it after his non-stop schedule for the past several years.

So the thing to do is make the most of it, I guess. I've actually gotten a lot done in this free time. Bassplaying, shredding, laundry. The fun never ends.

Go me. I even managed to not only vote early this year, but I took some time on a couple afternoons to read up on the candidates and issues before I did it. The internets make it really easy to do that you know.*wink*

Anyway, I might be a little off-topic more often these days, but if you keep reading, I'll keep blogging.

Here's another great Constantine image from Tim Seelig.

Vertigo publishing announces CONSTANTINE: THE OFFICIAL MOVIE ADAPTATION Written by Steven T. Seagle - Art and cover by Ron Randall & Jimmy Palmiotti

"John Constantine is a man who has literally been to hell and back in the Warner Bros. Pictures film Constantine, a supernatural thriller based on the long-running hit DC Comics/VERTIGO HELLBLAZER graphic novels. When Constantine teams up with skeptical policewoman Angela Dodson to solve the mysterious suicide of her twin sister, their investigation takes them through the world of demons and angels that exists just beneath the landscape of contemporary Los Angeles. Caught in a catastrophic series of otherworldly events, the two become inextricably involved and seek to find their own peace at whatever cost."

The 64 page graphic novel will go on sale January 5, 2005 for $6.95. It will also be included in the larger CONSTANTINE: THE HELLBLAZER COLLECTION, which collects the official 64-page VERTIGO adaptation of the film along with three classic issues of JOHN CONSTANTINE: HELLBLAZER. Included are issue #11, which kicked off VERTIGO's longest-running series and set the tone for the character; #27, which brought SANDMAN creator Neil Gaiman and his longtime artistic collaborator Dave McKean to the title with a haunting story of fear and loneliness; and #41, which opens the "Dangerous Habits" storyline with Constantine discovering that he has lung cancer in "The Beginning of the End." This 168 page collection is also on sale January 5 at a price of $14.95 and is suggested for mature readers.

-Thanks to John McMahon

Presenter, actor Keanu Reeves poses with Ve Neill, who won Makeup Artist of the Year at the Hollywood Film Festival's 2004 Hollywood Awards, in Beverly Hills October 18, 2004. Neill has done makeup for scores of films including 'Beetlejuice' and 'Pirates of the Caribbean The Curse of the Black Pearl.' REUTERS/Fred Prouser

Keanu is listed as a presenter at the Hollywood Film Awards that take place tonight at the Beverly Hilton Hotel.

Hopefully there will be some pictures of him all dolled up (and shaved!) in the morning.

I'm alternately having NO FUN AT ALL dealing with a fucked up travelocity reservation for my father and having GREAT BIG FUN with the new shredder I bought for the office.

Whee.

Freelance artist Tim Seelig created this striking Constantine image. You can see this one slightly larger and also a second version over at the new Straight-to-Hell forums. Tim gave us a first look of how Keanu would look as a scruffy John Constantine back in June of last year and has been designing various UK indy comic covers and one-shots since then. You can see some of his work, including some brilliant Hellblazer pieces at his gallery at BritComicArt.com.

Let's have a Bass Friday.

Here's a live clip of Flowers, an unreleased Dogstar tune. Reeves goes off on his own at the end, it's fun.

I'm really not a reader of fan-fiction. Maybe it has something to do with the few extremely creepy examples I came across in my early days of online fandom, but I really don't like the stuff that's about Keanu as Keanu. While I agree that he's an exquisite muse, and that there's frequently high quality writing involved, there's something about the things that are projected onto him that leave me a little squicked out. (Full disclosure: way back in the days I posted on USENET, I was baited into writing a piece of cliche-ridden tripe just to prove I could. I file it with the bungee-jumping experience. Regrettable. Should have kept my mouth shut.) We all have our fantasies but frankly I don't want to read every graphic, sticky, veiny detail of yours, ok? Thanks. That's just me though. There are folks that do, so....um....keep it up...so to speak.

That being said, I recognize that fanfic is certainly a popular form of creative expression, and using what/who you know and love as inspiration to create is a great place to start exploring your skills. On the non-squicky upside, there's a lot of good character-based fiction out there, and since it actually serves to explore a character beyond (or before) what we experience in a flim storyline, I tend to find it easier to enjoy. The various stories found over at BillandTed.org are a great example of good writing by fans who know and love their characters.

These stories vary from short and sweet - including two different versions of how Little Bill and Ted met - to most excellent homages to classic tales with a twist - to the very touching and thoughtful, including one where Ted decides to use the time machine to try to prevent the death of his mother, and my favorite: Someone to Watch Over You, written from the perspective of Ted's mother about the early days of the friendship of Bill and Ted.

It was raining steadily by late afternoon, and already you and Bill were restless and wanting to go outside. As any concerned mother, I resisted your pleads at first, but the minute there was a break in the rain I gave my permission. I barely caught sight of your raincoats as you darted through the kitchen into the back yard to carry out your boat races or whatever it is you used to do out there in the mud and water.

I was surprised to see almost two hours had passed when the sound of heavy drops hitting the aluminum rain gutters urged me to call you inside. I stood at the back door to make sure that wet garments would not force me to clean the kitchen floor again. Bill stepped easily out of the black galoshes, and I thought how terrible it was that his mother couldn't even buy him the right sized clothes. Then I saw your unprotected, soaking wet tennis shoes and understood.

"Ted 'Theodore' Logan! What do you mean, going outside without your boots?"

"But Mom, Bill didn't have any boots, so I lent him mine."

You try so hard to protect your children, repeatedly warning them and keeping after them, and yet things get by you and you want to unleash your exasperation upon the unwitting youth. But your explanation got to me. How could I possibly punish an act of selflessness?

That one made me a little pheklempt. *sniff*

I haven't had a chance to read them all, but I'd venture a guess that none of the stories at BillandTed.org are beyond PG-13 (and I'd like it to go on record right now that if there exists any Bill and Ted slash? I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT IT.) So if you'd like to take some time catching up on the possible histories and alternate exploits of the two great ones it's a good place to pass the time.

Zen really outdid herself showing Wee Neo around Canada. Here's the third and final installment of his Canadian adventures.

One of the reasons I wanted to take Neo to Prince Edward Island, other than the fact that it's very close to New Brunswick, is that it's teeny tiny, just like Wee Neo himself. It's in the little yellow circle on the Map above. PEI is Canada's smallest province. It's also the place where Martha Stewart buys her mussels. * cough * We tend not to talk about that anymore. PEI mussels are delicious however and you should have them if you ever visit there.

It is also very scenic. With lots of farms. And potatoes.

For our first stop, we decide to head for the beach. Cavendish beach is very popular and it will give us an opportunity to show Neo how PEI earth is red instead of the boring brown you see everywhere else.

We want to get closer to the water, so we head for the dunes. They are protected now by fences so that they're not destroyed by people walking over them. Neo is neither impressed nor intimidated by the fence.

Soon he's defying convention and stomping all over the dunes.

Next a 'legal' stroll on the beach. He stops to pose.

That's the Atlantic Ocean in the background!

Hungry from our trip to the beach, we head out to find a restaurant. PEI is surrounded by water, so what better place to have some fresh seafood. We happen on this cool restaurant shaped like a huge boat! There must be seafood here.

The flags on top represent each of the Canadian provinces. And at the very tip, the Acadian flag! I'm so impressed they remembered us. We decide to go inside. There is a lovely view from our table and I go outside on the "deck" with Neo to take a picture.

That huge bridge in the background is the Confederation Bridge which will take us back to New Brunswick. It was completed in 1997 and at 12.9 kilometres (8 miles) is the longest bridge over ice-covered waters in the world. Before it was built, the only way to get to PEI was by ferry.

While we're eating our delicious lobster and crab, Neo gets a little quiet. I ask him what's wrong but he won't talk much. I coax him with an extra lobster claw and he admits that he thought PEI would be smaller. "You know" he says looking sullen, "my size." I start smiling. I know just where to take him!

Down your drinks fellas, I tell my husband and Neo, we're going to Woodleigh!

Woodleigh Replicas & Gardens was built by a young soldier after World War II. He lived in PEI, but wanted to bring a piece of his ancestral home to it. He recreated some of Britain's most famous buildings and castles on his land in PEI. They are, of course, much smaller than the originals and therefore, totally Neo-sized!

First one we looked at, York Minister Cathedral. (This one had a sign, so I know for sure it was a Cathedral and not a Church. wink) Neo's so excited; he climbs up on top of the door frame.

We continue with the church theme for a bit. They're so pretty.

St. Martin-in-the-Fields

Try not to notice the fact that it's a bit, um leaning. Neo had a tiny flying incident. shhhh...He is so happy to be here, we don't want to dampen his enthusiasm.

St-Paul's Cathedral

Now, Neo's coat would have played off so well on all the white here, but stupid me got him to stand in front of that black door and he's practically invisible. I might add that Neo was not at all happy with my photography technique here.

I do a much better job at the Temple of Flora where Neo pretends he's the missing statue. hee!

Neo marvels at all the things his size.

The little bridge...

The teeny-ness of Glamis Castle...

Even a cannon!!! Oh, he had a bunch of fun here.

Of course, not everything was his size. The pillory was rather big, but then, for Neo, that would be a good thing.

We saw a little Mill...

A wee deck...

And last but not least, Shakespeare's Birthplace!

But all good things, even little things, must come to an end, so eventually, we had to go. I urge Neo to pose next to these lovely Lilly pads. He's not particularly interested, but I love them, and I can't remember ever having seen live Lilly pads before.

Then it';s across the Confederation bridge and back to New Brunswick. Neo decides it might be time for him to leave. He has been with us for a few weeks now. We offer to drive him to the airport. But before we do, since we are so close, we decide to take a little drive to Nova Scotia. This will be province number four for Neo and he thinks he might be setting some sort of record.

We don't have too much time, so where in Nova Scotia to go? Why here of course!

And may I report that while Panama hats may no longer be flying off the shelves here, thrice worn wrinkled suit jackets are way big. *wink*

The next place we visit is of course the winery. Jost Winery to be exact. They make some of the best ice wine in Canada here. And of course, I know you all know that Canada makes the best ice wines in the world. I mean, we know from ice. ;-) Before we sample though, we take a little walk through the fields.

Neo goes all Paul Sutton...

And then gets drunk on ice wine and pomme de glace and ends up in the grape smooshing barrels.

We let him sleep it off, drive him to the Moncton Airport and kiss him goodbye. He wouldn't tell me where he was headed next, but I'm pretty sure I saw his plane heading South. Hope he stays far away from the hurricanes.

I'm sure we'll be hearing from him again soon! Bye Neo!

Thank you Zen for being such an extraordinary hostess and tourguide for Wee Neo!

See his Québec adventure here and his escapades in New Brunswick here.
You can read all of Wee Neo's travel adventures here.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The astrological omens are pretty odd right now. They seem to be suggesting that your luck will be good and you'll be in maximum alignment with the cosmic rhythms if you watch a lot of daytime TV, eat heaps of junk food, get no more than four hours of sleep a night, and argue with yourself loudly in public. Just kidding, Virgo. I was merely testing to see whether you've become overly gullible towards so-called authorities like me. The truth is that you should free yourself from influences that presume to tell you what to do. Get their voices completely out of your head so you can clearly hear the still, small voice of your fiercely tender intuition.

-freewillastrology.com

This link from IMDB's Constantine forum (via club-keanu) says that the MPAA has given Constantine an R-rating and also mentions that there may be some re-shooting of scenes. If true, that's good news that they won't be watering it down for a PG-13. I don't know what to think about the need for re-shoots. I'm just glad I have an excuse to use this picture.

I'm still recovering from having a crazy busy weekend with not one, but two Vibemerchant shows. The best part was that Nudel braved scary cab rides and smoke-filled dive bars to see us! It was so awesome to have her there and we had a great time. She even got to see me nail the solo in Oblivious on Friday night. Of course, she and Wanda (thanks for coming!) also got to see me completely fuck it up on Saturday after the bar owner told us to turn down and harshed the band's whole groove. Bah. We're going to start covering Vanishing instead. I can't take the pressure.

Nudel also got to see my debut singing a little backup on our new song, Knock Me Down . Yeesh, I was nervous. I ordered a double-shot of straight vodka before we hit the stage and set it on my amp for right before that song. I'm not sure if it helped or not, I couldn't really hear. Nothing was thrown at us, so I guess it was OK. I don't really want to sing, but it serves that particular song well.

I was less nervous on Saturday, but that was because NO ONE was in the place. Nudel and Wanda were the crowd and kept us going that night. The whole band thanks both of you for being there, seriously. We made a mistake of not flyering the area or promoting the show aside from on the website. Also, I pushed to go on by 11:30 because I thought that was plenty late, but the place must be a swing-shift watering hole because it was finally filling up at 1am with customers. Live and learn. We play there again on the 13th of Nov.

Anyway, I had a great time with Nudel here and can't wait for her to come back :)

Rawk!

Thanks to Ian for emailing me about his site speedcollector.com, which showcases his collection of Speed memorabilia. He's got everything from action figures to posters from around the world. I think my favorite item is the inflatable bus!

Take some time and look around. Each item has a comment section and I think Ian would really like some help from fans around the world with some questions about some of his items.

Also, Ian has a wish list, so if you have any Spanish promo postcards or rubber guns and wardrobe you're looking to get rid of, let him know!

News-Medical.net has an interesting article about a study that involves 12 ferrets watching The Matrix. Hee!

Weliky, in a bit of irony, set 12 ferrets watching the reality-stretching film The Matrix. He recorded how their brains responded to the film, as well as to a null pattern like enlarged television static, and a darkened room. Movies capture the visual elements that are present in the real world. For instance, as Keanu’s hand moves across the screen for a karate chop, the image of the hand and all the lines and color it represents moves across a viewer’s visual realm essentially the same way it would in real life. By contrast, the enlarged static—blocks of random black and white—has no such motion. Weliky was able to graph the movie-motion statistically, showing essentially how objects move in the visual field.

The article goes on to decribe two suprising discoveries made by the researchers about how young and adult brains process visual stimuli differently. It's very interesting.

Of course, there's no mention of the third and most important breakthrough...

Ferrets love Keanu!

I guess that explains some of the less coherent comments we get here from time to time.

The new humanity will be universal,
And it will have the artist's attitude, that of the musician;
That is, it will recognize that the immense
value and beauty of the human being
lies precisely in the fact that each individual belongs
To two realms, simultaneously,
that of nature and that of the spirit.

--Thomas Mann

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The British are not renowned for their fine cuisine. In any ranking of the world's culinary traditions, theirs would be near the bottom. And yet the Brits are responsible for having created and propagated the Western world's single most popular food, the sandwich. In a comparable way, Virgo, I predict that you will soon succeed in an area where you have little credibility or status. Either that, or you will produce some anomalously great thing that you supposedly have no talent for.

-thanks to freewillastrology.com.

audio post powered by audblog

Also, Nudel brought Wee Neo home, and he was bearing gifts!
*smoooooches*

Eeeeee! I just got off the phone with Nudel! She's in Vegas this week and we've got plans to carouse this evening. When I get off work, I'll be picking her up where the bible salesman left Jjaks off and then we're going to the Little Buddha Cafe for dinner.

Not sure what's next, maybe I can talk her into hitting the Hard Rock for some blackjack.

Oooooh, maybe we should visit the Red Square vodka bar and then do some drunken audblogging. Hee!

I'm so glad she's here this week, especially since we have a couple gigs so she can check out the band.

Yay!

The finger, known variously as the one-finger salute, the highway salute, flipping (someone) off, flipping the bird or the Trudeau salute (in Canada). It is a hand gesture made by extending the middle finger of the hand while bending the other fingers at the second knuckle. It has an offensive meaning in some cultures, comparable to "fuck you".

The origins of this gesture is highly speculative. It is identified as the "impudent finger" in Ancient Roman writings. It was defined there as a gesture intended to insult another. It has been noted that the gesture resembles an erect penis. Ancient Romans considered an image of an erect phallus as a talisman against evil spells. As a consequence, displaying this gesture to another may not have been a pseudo-sexual insult but rather a insulting statement along the lines of – "I'm going to protect myself against your witchcraft, before you even start."

The "one-finger salute," or at any rate sexual gestures involving the middle finger, are thousands of years old. In Gestures: Their Origins and Distribution, Desmond Morris and colleagues note that the digitus infamis or digitus impudicus (infamous or indecent finger) is mentioned several times in the literature of ancient Rome. Turning to our vast classical library, we quickly turn up three references. Two are from the epigrammatist Martial: "Laugh loudly, Sextillus, when someone calls you a queen and put your middle finger out."

In the other reference Martial writes that a certain party "points a finger, an indecent one, at" some other people. The historian Suetonius, writing about Augustus Caesar, says the emperor "expelled [the entertainer] Pylades . . . because when a spectator started to hiss, he called the attention of the whole audience to him with an obscene movement of his middle finger." Morris also claims that the mad emperor Caligula, as an insult, would extend his middle finger for supplicants to kiss.

It's not known whether one displayed the digitus infamis in the same manner that we (well, you) flip the bird today. In another of his books Morris describes a variety of sexual insults involving the middle finger, such as the "middle-finger down prod," the "middle-finger erect," etc., all of which are different from the classic middle-finger jerk.

The widely held claim that the 'middle finger salute' is derived from the defiant gestures of English archers whose fingers had been severed by the French at the Battle of Agincourt is most likely a myth.

See also: The V-sign & The Shocker.

Heh.

Rogan did this great edit of the Hellblazer #200 cover and I couldn't resist.

The Straight-to-Hell forums have changed location, by the way. The shiny new forum is here. The old forum is locked but still remains a useful archive of information, heated debate and full-on bitchery.

The new forum of course has a Constantine section so be sure to check in periodically for information and discussion.

Thanks to Joy for this Entertainment Weekly Celebrity Photography link featuring Keanu.

Photograph by Robert Maxwell October 19, 2003 Los Angeles

''What I like about Keanu is the sense of shyness about him,'' says Maxwell, who shot the Matrix Revolutions stud at an empty soundstage. ''You'd expect more of a cocky, suave [guy] since he's such a sex symbol. But he was very simple.'' Hence Maxwell's ''rebellious'' decision: forgo a sci-fi-centric setup for one with a relaxed vibe. ''I tend to wing every shoot, and I found him just sitting there a thousand times more interesting.''

I've liked Maxwell's work for a while, and now I like his attitude as well.

We have a gig tonight.

Everyone have a great weekend.